Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Fancy System Glitch

Hi Y'all. Gonna red up that there room and then brush my tooth.

Yes it's really me, Fancy Pants here. Just thought I would alter my diction to match my appearance. Would you like to know what I'm wearing right now? Yes, I thought you would. Shall we start at the bottom?

Red Christmas socks. Above those are cropped terry cloth black "leisure" bottoms. Yes, that is a brown sweatshirt from the now defunct Pop Tart shoppe in New York. Oh, correct. No bra. But do you like my designer eyeglasses? Do they go nicely with last night's makeup and my as-yet-uncombed hair?

Okay, now I know you are all wondering. Has Fancy lost her mind? Is she ill? Has there been a death in the family?

No. Relax. It's worse.

The cleaning lady is sick.

I have company coming over this evening.

It's not pretty. Thank God Nanny #1 has the Minis out for the day and Fancy PA is upstairs addressing Christmas cards.

It's the holidays. No one should be allowed to vomit.

This is all particularly painful because H just finished complaining to Fancy Therapist about my "comfortable" clothes I wear to bed. And apparently to scrub toilets. Good thing he's out of town this week and can't see what's going on here.

Of course, he dresses more "Elmo had 4 ducks" than "Zegna." But still. Being Fancy all the time is simply impossible. And I guarantee his idea of a "maid" costume and the one I'm currently wearing are very, very different.

Okay, back to work. What exactly is the difference between bathroom Cif and kitchen Cif?


  1. Really Fancy, you can do just a quick wipe down for guests, no need to break out the Cif! Unless the maid's been sick over a week, in which case, my condolences.

  2. I love you Moomsie! Thank you. There is concern she will still be ill before the weekend but we have arranged back up. My costume will however remain the same...

  3. I thought you'd been instructed to do the cleaning in your 'hooker' boots? Not a good situation though is it? How very inconsiderate of your cleaner.

  4. Fancy, if you are "redding up" the room I bet there's some Central/Western PA in your background! Somethings never change.

  5. Ah, since the loss of my job the cleaning woman no longer darkens my door. I call your fuzzy socks and raise you a head scarf.

  6. but come on, do you have a Poptart sweatshirt?

  7. I think you're very sensible. Who wants toilet water sloshing on their designer duds? Very practical indeed!