Tuesday, 23 August 2011

Fancy Lovin'


So Fancy here is finally gearing up for her real summer holiday. As in sans-Minis. I love my little darlings to death but I think a couple of flights on Cheap Ass Air with toddlers followed by a week without a Nanny earns one a weekend away, don't you?

However, I have a little problem. See Fancy PA did my packing for my last little trip to the place where the hairy-lipped live. And when I opened my suitcase, well I've never felt so attended to.

But she's only here a couple of days a week and the night before this trip isn't one of them. So I've done what any self-respecting Fancy gal would do and simply offered her an extra day of work this week. To pack our suitcases. Which will be a very welcome change from the usual last-minute, wrinkled clothing, forgot my jewelry, "oh for God's sake, we'll just get hotel laundry to deal with that" morning of departure that I am oh so used to.

"Fancy PA is coming in extra this week to pack for us. Anything specific you want me to tell her?"

"What? Why is she coming in to pack for us. Isn't that a tad excessive? I don't think you should be getting dependent on other people for things like this," said the man who demanded we hire someone to change our lightbulbs.

"Darling, can you tell me when was the last time you were home for dinner?" I asked, the Fancy wife who spends most evenings drinking wine and watching iTunes while her spouse flies around the world/stays in the office until 3 am/attends working dinners.

He looked at me for a moment. "I have no fucking idea," he finally admitted.

"Okay, so then if I need to have my underwear wrapped in little sheets of tissue paper to make me feel loved, if finding a polaroid of my jewelry grouped with various items of clothing makes me feel truly cared for, then I think you need to accept that this is just something I have to do."

Okay so I pay for my lovin', which can get you arrested in some circumstances, but in this one just makes me feel good. And that's important, don't you think?


25 comments:

  1. Absolutely! In fact, if he doesn't like it then make sure she doesn't use the tissue paper on his underwear,,, only yours.

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  2. You intrigue me Frau Fancy but truly I am fascinated by your husband.

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  3. This makes perfect sense to me. I mean seriously, it's only one day and it makes you happy. That's worth it - Fancy Hubby should realize this insinctively by now, no?

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  4. Send me your PA! It could be a blog giveaway.

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  5. I should not have read this... I have spent practically the whole of august packing and unpacking for one thing or another, i am weary of it. I hate you!!! (said with lots of affection of course x)

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  6. A woman after my own heart, my husband always says our first reaction ( a good one) is to throw money at any problem. My kids wanted to get away this weekend so did my packing, ended up with spanx and uggs, Oh well we were up in the vines...

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  7. um, "throw money at it" is actually Fancy Therapists one and only solution to everything...

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  8. I mean, assuming you are doing what I'm doing which is making "hate" a code word for "love and adore!"

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  9. ha ha ha!!! You kill me Kung Fu Panda!!!

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  10. That would require emotional intelligence...

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  11. Ha ha! I think I'm going to make him buy his own tissue. Although in all reality he'd probably chuck it to the side and make some rude comment about wasted paper...

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  12. As I've been packing all the live long day for the (almost ready but still door and window-less) beach house and then will spend all of thursday and friday packing for four people for our holiday (because despite my threats I'm pretty certain the husband won't pack for himself) I almost wish Fancy PA gets sick before your trip... but that would be mean-spirited... because the truth is, right now, I'm thinking of investing the money we spend on the Nanny on a PA. Of course that opens up a whole 'nother can of worms doesn't it. Sigh.

    Have fun on your well-deserved, properly packed, vacation!

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  13. There is such a thing as a Nanny/PA. Or you could look for a very well trained housekeeper. Because I'm all about opening those cans...x

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  14. Go you! I am liking the idea of a fancy PA giveaway! x

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  15. why of course! can i enter the blog comp for the pa pls? x

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  16. Wow. She is seriously good. (Only popped over because I heard about the fancy PA competition...)

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  17. har har! there is a shipping issue with your address and human bodies. sorry!!!

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  18. again, it's a FedEx, VAT issue. I'm working on it. Will advise...

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  19. you guys are killing me! I'll go get a box and poke some holes in it!

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  20. That IS important, as I'm sure your husband was wise enough to agree with. And honestly, the love you're receiving here is so clean and STD-free!

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  21. my word I didn't think of that! Yes, sparkling clean!

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  22. Oh my god..... so not only does someone else pack for you, but she includes polaroids of your accessories? Can we swap lives just for a little while?

    The minute our ship comes in (where are you ship???) I have been promised a cleaner. Until then, I will pretend I am you. That sounds like such fun.

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  23. Have you checked your lighthouse? Maybe the bulb's burned out?

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