Monday, 3 October 2011

Fancy Confusion


Sometimes I wonder, is it me or is it them? I mean, am I the one off my rocker or is it me against the world? Or at least me against the world of home decorating.

Remember my curtains? The ones that were wrong in every way possible? Well, much to my surprise, even though they were almost immediately ripped from the ceiling and returned to the factory, my decorator actually expects me to pay for them.

Yes, something like four thousand pounds and change for what amounts to holes in my walls and extreme intimacy with my neighbours.

Seriously? I am supposed to pay for curtains that no longer exist?

Apparently it's not her fault that they were yellow. No, that was the sunlight. She couldn't have predicted this.

"But I saw them in the evening, after the sun had gone down," was my answer.

"Well, then it is the way artificial light hits them," she reasoned.

"Um, could it be, I don't know, if they are yellow in the sunlight and they are yellow in artificial light, well, could it be that they are actually fucking yellow?"

So, what do you think? Is it me?

19 comments:

  1. I don't know Fancy, 4,000 pounds for intimacy with your neighbors, in today's world, sounds like a bargain to me!
    Another thing, if you would be so kind as to post your Fancy Decorator's email (although, I would now choose a new moniker for her, like Ridiculous Decorator, Unprofessional Decorator, Color-blind Decorator) I'm sure we would all gladly send her emails along the lines of : "No, she did NOT want yellow curtains" for a few weeks, this way she can really earn her pay.
    I'm thinking blinds now right?

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  2. I'm still available ;) xx

    ps the bloody curtains were obviously YELLOW, tell her to get real and DO NOT pay for them!

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  3. keeping you on the list Mackie!

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  4. I bet those curtains never went back to the factory - in fact I bet they never even came from the factory. She's probably been trying to off load them for ages and you looked like the sucker to fall for it. Silly lady.

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  5. Yes I am feeling like a big time sucker these days. Sucker.

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  6. Hell no it's not you. It's desperate, money-sucking decorator.

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  7. This happened to me with a glider two weeks before I gave birth. Some fancy kid's store owner promised me a cool, retro burnt orange and when the chair arrive it was APRICOT! Horrible and I am still pissed. I never sat in it and gave it to a friend. The decorator should eat the cost and the pineapple she stole the color from!

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  8. WHO PAYS FOUR GRAND FOR SOME CURTAINS?? FOR SOME YELLOW CURTAINS?? Then again - WHO CHARGES FOUR GRAND FOR YELLOW CURTAINS?? Madness! But yeah, don't pay. You don't have them - so don't pay for them!

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  9. Every monday, I waddle down to my local fabric shop and they help me to make my own roman blind for an enormous window. I buy all the fabric from them and give them a little cash for their time. It'll work out at half the price and I'll know how to do it in future! I also get to enjoy some bawdy girly humour :)

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  10. Stupid decorator, what me to cut the bitch for you?

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  11. Is she crazy?! You returned them. DO NOT PAY

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  12. This is why I gave up being a decorator and started working in a law firm instead. Not that I think you are in any way wrong in this situation. Kate's right, she's probably been trying to off load those things for ages and has probably turned them into throw cushions another client.

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  13. Hi Fancy, realize this is probably unnecessary but am getting worried about you... Did you fly the fancy coop for an exotic locale and consequently have substituted blogging with fruity cocktail drink with cute umbrella (in which case enjoy!) or has your fancy decorator kidnapped you demanding a 4,000 pound ransom as well as for you to prominently display the yellow curtains in your fancy home (in which case, don't cave!)? Just checking in!

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  14. Holy moley - four thousands pounds? This is why you pay a decorator - to be done with all those worries about yellow so it doesn't become YELLOW! I can always stuff things up by myself quite nicely but expect designers to know a little better...

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  15. Hey FF - caught you in the Powder Room a while ago but missing you on the blog - Hope all is well lovely xx

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  16. I will lure you out by fair means or foul FF - passing you the Versatile Blogger Award because a) you deserve it and b) I MISS you!

    http://peopledonteatenoughfudge.blogspot.com/2011/11/versatile-blogger.html

    Sarah xx

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  17. Hope you're okay? Missing you here!

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  18. I'm here!!! Sorry! I needed a month. :-)
    x

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