- Cool Whip. For those of you who haven’t had the pleasure of residing in the Colonies, Cool Whip is non-dairy, nearly entirely made of chemicals, can be found in a tub or a spray can and is available in regular, light, fat free and low sugar formulas. And when you put a tub in the freezer, it is almost like eating vanilla ice cream, minus the calories. Find me in a hotel across the Pond? Find Cool Whip in my mini-fridge. And a spoon.
- Trashy erotica. But seriously, that’s not very exciting. What’s exciting is that I’m admitting it. C’mon, are you willing to let us all look under your bed?
- The Osmonds. The greatest band that ever lived. I’ve nothing else to say.
- Vegas! There’s two ways to do Vegas: the way I did it with my pals and sisters when I was Poor Folk and the way I do it with H. I prefer the Fancy way. Seriously. The free drinks at the blackjack table suck, but if you send the waitress to the restaurant bar with your room number, she’ll bring you back a very nice bottle of wine. Which isn’t free, but won’t give you a migraine. Which means you can return to the table in the morning and resume your boozing.
- A bath. Without children. Door locked. No bubbles, nothing Fancy. Okay, maybe a glass of bubbly, but just me, solitude and a book. I liked it before we had kids. I need it, I crave it now.
**Progress report: Wednesday Diet Cokes: 2.5; baggage received: 1; baggage outstanding: 1!!