Friday, 25 February 2011

Fancy Interviews



Fancy is in a bad mood. Maybe you noticed. I’m stressed to the gills with a work assignment and H pointed out last night that “the house looks it.” Thanks. You would think that a couple of nannies and a housekeeper could keep up with the destructive forces of my husband and my children. (I’m not to blame. I’ve been holed up in my office upstairs, not brushing my teeth until 4 in the afternoon but also not generating any sort of mess.)

It’s not work that has me in a foul mood. It’s that I’m going to have to interrupt my flow this morning to interview a new Nanny. And spend my Saturday meeting girls that are closer in age to my toddlers than myself and try to decide if any of them are capable of walking in and dealing with those two monkeys without simultaneously annoying the crap out of me.

Oh I should point out that Nanny #1 is leaving. Yes, the dirty nappies tucked into the drawer were a clear sign. If I weren’t such a moron I would have realized it sooner. Sigh.

Why don’t I think this is fun? Because it’s a crapshoot. I can meet someone and think she is wonderful only to realize after hiring her that she never stops talking and has an obsession with chocolate eclairs and Bollywood.

Then there are those that never make it to stage 2. Last summer the agency sent over a girl for the Weekend Nanny position. She arrived 20 minutes late, which didn’t do her any favors. But then our conversation went like this:

“So, what do the girls do during the week? I mean, do they go to a nursery?”

I looked at her blankly. “They have a Nanny.”

“Oh,” she said, with a look of total surprise. “You have two Nannies?”

“Three,” I replied dryly. “We have someone still coming at night right now.”

She actually snorted here. The nail in her coffin was coming next. “Oh my God! You have three Nannies?! Ha ha ha!!”

That’s right, my dear. Word of advice. When someone without a full-time job is looking for a Weekend Nanny, you’re probably not going to be the only hired help.

Obviously she didn’t get the job. Instead I hired a very sweet girl who is “afraid to go into John Lewis. It’s soooo overwhelming!” but at least keeps reminding me that I need to make sure I have enough rest and “me time.”

Wish me luck. I’m going out there and getting myself the Mary Fucking Poppins of Nannies. No matter how much I hate it. 

5 comments:

  1. Can't you just leave the little darlings with a bowl of water and kibble?

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  2. if this one doe not work out you should dump her in John Lewis x

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  3. I'm with Notes to self plus two--you know the new nanny's achilles heel, threaten her with it at every opportunity. That'll make her behave.

    So when you interview the next one, be sure to ask what terrifies her most in the world!

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  4. I'm afraid of John Lewis too - it's got to be Peter Jones if you have to slum it. Good luck - we watched Nanny McPhee and I have to say that got me thinking....x

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  5. I'm with Notes to self plus two--you know the new nanny's achilles heel, threaten her with it at every opportunity. That'll make her behave.

    So when you interview the next one, be sure to ask what terrifies her most in the world!

    ReplyDelete