Monday, 27 June 2011

Fancy's CyberMummy Adventure

“Well, what else? I mean, you were gone for like 3 hours. You must have something to say.”

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is proof that while H pretends to think “blogging” is a slightly silly and (for us) a dangerous game, he’s really quite curious. And when I snuck off to CyberMummy for the last of the speakers and a few drinkies, he watched me go with a mix of fear and interest. Okay that is a lie. He was taking a nap. I helped Nanny #2 get the Minis bathed and fed and then walked out the door. But he knew where I was going. And he knew I was going as myself, no wig, no big glasses. And that was risky.

It was actually Fancy Therapist’s idea for me to start this blog: “Stop stop! I can’t take it! You have got to write this shit down! It’s unbelievable. People would eat this up. I mean, seriously, you can’t make crap like this up.”

So I brought it up to H. He said no. No. “Too risky. People find out who we are and it’s a disaster. And your career would be over. No one would listen to anything you have to say. Don’t do it.”

But as usual, Fancy here doesn’t listen. So I created a blog and posted for a week. Then I told H. And he was amused. (Whew!) I’d changed just enough, hidden just enough details to keep The Fancies behind a veil. And if people enjoyed it, and it made me happy, then it was okay.

Then he started getting a little too into it. “Psst, write this down! ‘root rot.’ That’s an awesome blog idea.”

What? Fortunately for you lot, I continue to ignore him.

Anyway, I took a chance this weekend and am so glad I did. No I didn’t wear a nametag and I certainly didn’t advertise my presence. I stalked the edges of the room, searching for the few ladies I was desperate to say hi to, to thank for all the support and love I’ve gotten in this comical world of virtual blogships.  No, I didn’t find everyone I was looking for, but I still call it a success.

I’m not sure what Notes thought at first as I walked up to her, grabbed her nametag and pulled her towards me, whispering, “Fancy a drink?” into her ear but the screech and hug was worth the odd approach.

Emma from Mummymummymum had tweeted me her outfit and I stood by the back door, scanning all the outfits, probably looking like a complete fashion snob but actually just waiting for a red shirt and flowery skirt and I found her! Mission accomplished!

Of course, Kate Takes 5 and I had great plans to meet up but I am apparently colour blind. “That shirt is not yellow. That is peach. Or gold. Or something else, but certainly not yellow,” she admonished me, when I finally tracked her down at the Netmums drinkies. Fine. Okay. Got it. Not yellow. But still, how awesome was it to finally talk to her? Not to mention MidThirtiesLife who is actually that pretty. Yes, she is. 

Then there are those that I really wanted to see but missed. Gemma tweeted me last night that she was also at All Bar One but couldn’t be bothered to see hi. Apparently the fact that Fancy here is a living, breathing person and not make-believe was too much for her. Seriously bummed here, Gemma.

And Lou. I looked everywhere for a lady with farm boots and a chicken. I asked everyone. I scoured that room, eyes peeled for a stray feather or a bit of mud. Nothing. Next time. I promise.

Afterwards I met H for a bit of dinner. And as he picked through my bag of swag he wanted to hear what happened.

“So you know what? I know you said that I can never actually be friends with any of these women, but I’m not sure you are right. It didn’t seem like a great conspiracy to bring down the Fancies. They were just really curious and happy to see me. And I was thrilled to see them. Yes, I know I have to be careful. But maybe, just maybe?”

He shrugged. "Maybe so." 

So thanks to those of you who made such an effort to find me! And to those I didn't get to see, we'll get there. Possibly next year I’ll actually get to hear all of the speakers? That would be nice. A girl can dream, can’t she?


  1. I missed you! I was at the bar. In white. Next time x

  2. Lovely to meet you!!!! Shame you didn't come for a curry xzz

  3. Meeting you was one of the highlights of the day! Finally I can put a face to the blog and you are just as lovely and funny in real life as you are in your blog. Don't wait till next year for another meet up, organise a fancy one soon! x

  4. Glad you went and had a good time. My hubby is always scared that somehow my cover will be blown and people will find out who is behind the curtain (so to speak). I have absolutely no profile at all so it would just be the embarrassment of having my friends and family read my words. But the hubby has an important enough job that he worries about exposure. He is supportive of me because he can see how much blogging helps me process my feelings, but he is happy I have chosen to write anonymously. One of my posts was featured at Blog Her and he just about had a panic attack worrying that someone would read and recognize our story. So I wouldn't have dared to go to cybermummy just for that reason.

  5. Cool! Good that H is relaxing a little. Becoming un-anonymous can be freaky even to unfancy people :)

    Anyway, the speakers and workshops were fun, but the socialising afterwards is the best bit in my opinion!

  6. Okay is this an "anonymous" joke? Cuz you are all coming up as "I'm So Fancy" in comments. Yikes!!! Disqus issue.

  7. I would have had a drink with you..... We could have been anonymous together. (And accessorised our outifts with those funny glasses with the fake nose and moustache, we wouldn't have stood out at all) Alas I was stuck on The Farm.

    Glad you went and glad you enjoyed it.

  8. Of course you were at the bar! Ha, funny we didn't connect because that was my deer stand. x

  9. Alas, H is only so tolerant. But wonderful to finally meet you! x

  10. Completely understand! Your story is so personal and like me, this is a forum where you can be completely honest about your feelings so keeping it private is necessary. Maybe one day...x

  11. Sounds like you all had a fabulous time! So jealous... oh well, maybe next year! Emma :)

  12. Shit! Missed you..... honestly you take a bloody chicken to the toilet for 5 sodding minutes and you miss all the good stuff. Sigh....

    Still, my chicken probably would've ruined those white jeans.

    Rumour has it you look just like your picture anyhoo.....

    Next time baby. xx

  13. Ha ha! Maybe you should get a younger chicken. One who can hold it longer! :-) xx

  14. Okay Fancy Pancy,

    You are killig me. I want to know who you really are and will tell NO ONE! I live in the states, wallow in my own yoga pants daily and am great at keeping secrets. And if I had been at The Mum Blog Thing 2011 I would have bought you two drinks and some chips asked tried to pry your amazing handbag out of your perfectly manicured hand model hands.Don't try and pretend you were wearing a backpack. I will NEVER believe it!

    Your fan,

    The Biter

  15. Actually you were a huge disappointment - not a tiara in sight...(Actually you were of course a big highlight - so happy you made the effort. xx)

  16. Oh you know how H gets about me wearing all my jewels in public! Next time, next time. xx

  17. Oh my. You can say I am pretty as much as you like!! Thanks! I don't think I've ever been called pretty before. I'll be going to bed with a huge head now. Right after I forward this post to every single person I have ever met.

    So happy you managed to come along. I was looking out for a yellow top at the bar at the Brewery, and Kate is right. It wasn't yellow. It was beautiful, but not yellow. You LIAR!

    Meeting you was one of my highlights of a fab day. Hope we get to meet again. xx

  18. Well you're a bit far from Arizona to catch a drink with. Maybe a skype date with wine.

  19. Fascinating, have never been to one of these and really enjoyed your account..bizarrely my husband is really private but doesn't mind being in my blog. Always wondered what it would be like to actually meet up with all your fellow bloggers

  20. Hello, glad we got to meet, in All Bar One. Hope your dinner at the Larder was as scrummy as curry :)

  21. Sounds like you had fun, shame you only got away for a few hours. I was at the Netmums reception too, if only I had known their was fancy royalty in presence!

    Mich x

  22. It's not that I couldn't be bothered - it's just that I didn't. It's that whole CM dilemma, stand on your own - you look like billy no-mates. Talk to people and then you can't talk to anyone else or worse it's difficult to interrupt... what's a girl to do? Probably, shout stop! shove the woman I was speaking to out of the way, shove Mid 30's out of the way and grab you.... I should have done that.
    I found a mysterious Lou of the Larches card in my goodie bag - I suspect she was in her wellies distributing them when no one was looking.
    I also suspect from this post that you 'crashed' the event?! if you did, I love that!

  23. ha I know! Just poking fun. No actually paid for the ticket. Just chickened
    out. And speaking of chickens, can't believe you saw Lou when I was looking

  24. They seek her 'ere they seek 'er there
    That chicken-woman is a 'mare.

  25. Bring down the fancies? Nonsense! I am too busy trying to stay the right way up. :-) xxx